Hello, my name is William David Jacob, but you can call me Will, and this is my journal. I was born on September 16, 2010 at 10:12 a.m. I weighed 8 lbs. and 2 oz. and I was 20.75 inches long. My mommy was originally scheduled to give birth to me today (9/21), but I just couldn’t wait any longer in the womb. I listened to my dad last Sunday watch the Bengals game against the Patriots, and it sounded like they needed help on defense, so I decided to come early to learn the game-plan for Sunday’s game against the Ravens. I was so excited for the game that I fell asleep. I don’t think mom and dad would’ve let me play anyway. That’s no fun.
Anyway, back to my birth, my mom had this thing called a C-section because I wanted to hit the ground running when I was born. Plus, I was a little big (85th percentile in weight!), and mom didn’t want to deal with that. I wasn’t out of the womb for more than two seconds before I pooped on the doctor, and then when the nurse took me to clean me off, I peed all over her. Dad found out later that they were Steelers fans, and he was very proud of me in my efforts. He told me that he’s going to take me to all of his tailgate parties before football games so that we can find all the Steelers fans out there so I can poop and pee on them.
My mom and dad spent the next three days at Christ Hospital in Cincinnati. We had a very nice room with a spectacularific view of Cincinnati. We were nine floors up and we could see for many miles. Mom and dad liked to watch the sunset while rocking me to sleep. Dad liked the room a lot, but the TV was very small and it didn’t have Comedy Central, but it did have ESPN and FoxSports Ohio so we could watch some sports. My dad was a little bummed out that the Reds lost the day that I was born, but he said that’s okay because I was born into a world where the Reds have always been in first place. The Reds “magic number” for the playoffs is six. Whatever that means, dad. He’s a little weird about that stuff. He tells me that one day I’ll understand.
We had many nice people visit us during our stay in the hospital. Grandma Nancy and Aunt Jo saw me on Thursday, and then they came back to see me again with Aunt Katie, Uncle Sean, my cousin Ron, and Uncle Mike! It was great to see my new family! Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Bob will see me soon, but they did get to hear me and my “Voicing My Discomfort with This Weird, New World” on the first day. I can’t wait to meet them and all of my new family members, including Mom-o, Pop-o, Aunt Beka, Uncle Wes, Aunt Sara, Uncle Ben, my cousin Skylee, Uncle Toph, his friend Alyssa, Uncle Ryan, and his friend Brandie. I have a great, huge family!
My mom says that I’m a very good eater, and I also sleep very well. And the only time that I’m “Voicing My Discomfort with Something,” it’s for obvious reasons (poopy diaper, I’m not swaddled, I’m hungry, or the Bengals/Reds are losing… wait, that’s just dad… he “voices his discomfort” a lot). When mom or dad swaddle me, they like to call me "Burrito Will." I think they go to Chipotle too often.
I came home on Sunday, September 20 and I met my two awesome, furry sisters, Bella and Lola! They have been very excited to see me, and I am a part of their pack now. They like to sniff me and they try to lick my hands and feet, but mom and dad won’t let them. On the first night at the house, Bella and Lola did not want to go to bed by themselves. They barked and whined because they wanted to make sure that I was okay. Luckily they realize now that mom and dad are taking great care of me so they don’t need to check up on me when they are in bed. Whenever I cry, though, they quickly run into the room to make sure I’m okay. If I’m in the crib, they try to look inside by standing on their hind legs, but they’re too short. I can’t wait until I get older so I can run around and play with them!
Well, I’m pretty tired right now. All this typing is wearing me out. And since I sleep about 20 hours a day, I think I need another nap. Well, world, it’s nice to have met you! So far life has been great and I have two wonderful parents!
- WDJ
