Dear Santa, I've Been a VERY Good Boy This Year

Dear Santa,

I've been a very, very, VERY good boy this year. Part of the reason is that I've only had a chance to be bad or good for just one-fourth of the year, but even if I had been in the outside world during that time, I still would've been the best behaved boy on the planet.



Today was my first time that I ever met you at my awesome daycare, First Impressions. I was very good for you, if you may recall, and I didn't fuss, cry, pee, or poop on you. I sat on your lap and I told you all about what I wanted for Christmas. But just in case you forgot, here is everything that I wanted:

- Peace on Earth

- Good Will toward Men. Wait a second, Why would I need to be good toward just men? I think I'll be good to women, especially my mommy, Mimi, Mom-o, and Grandma Nancy. They are my super-d-duper ladies. Make sure you are generous to them, too!

- The 2011 Convertible Corvette in Cherry Red, with Magnetic Selective Ride Control, and a 7.0 Liter V8 engine: 505 hp with six-speed manual transmission and launch control. I would like to have a nice giant bow on this, too. Thanks.

- Flubber

- A Sweet Hog, and I'm not talking about the animal. (Papi, isn't yours for sale?)

- The Cubs, Reds, Bengals, and Bears all to win their respective sporting championships. I don't care if it's impossible, please try to make it possible to make both mommy and daddy deliriously happy. But, if I had to choose one, I'd choose the Cubs, because nothing is sadder than the Cubs, according to my daddy. Wait, he says, Ah, Never mind. Apparently, he was going to say something about the Bengals, but started to tear up.

Well, that's all I can think of right now. I'm sure I'll have tons of new ideas tomorrow and the rest of the days before Christmas. I was very happy to meet you, Mr. Magic Gift Man, known as the Santa. I am very happy that you exist in my world. I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

-WDJ

P.S. Cool Beard, Mr. Santa. You make me miss my Uncle-Crazy-Legs Wes.

I'm One-Fourth of the Way to a Year Old

Hello everybody!

I've had some exciting new things happen in the past month. One of the most awesome new things is that I'm starting to smile a lot more! I give my smiles much more frequently and my mommy and daddy love it. Plus, I am starting to have "reaction smiles." Dad likes to make goofy sounds and faces at me, and I'm loving it! Keep it up with the goofiness, dad. Or, since mommy and daddy like to tell me "More smiles, please": More silliness, please.

I am also becoming a great talker and singer. I've been saying lots of "oooohs" and "ah-goooos." I'm just trying to imitate my mommy and daddy who like to sing to me. I think they are the most fantastic, superific singers in the world. I could not imagine any two singers who could sing any better. I've heard of this girl named Taylor Swift. She has NOTHING on MY mommy. Mommy likes to sing Christmas songs to me, and she likes to make up songs on the spot. Daddy sings to me songs like "American Pie," "Piano Man," Pearl Jam songs, and Green Day Songs. Both mommy and daddy say that they need to brush up on their lyrics. That's okay, I think they're awesome and they might become the new John and Yoko.

Daddy also started to read to me Ulysses by James Joyce, which is a fantastic and interesting novel. We've already read four chapters, and daddy told me that he wants to read a book to me that he's never finished. He told me that it doesn't matter what he reads to me; it's just the act of reading that will help me in my speech development (okay, dad, Whatever *eye roll*).

Mom says I'm like daddy because I talk the most usually in the mornings. I usually like to discuss my ideas about existentialism and Platonic love, but Sunday my mommy and daddy missed what I was trying to tell them. You see, daddy likes to watch this really sad-sack football team called the Stupid Bungles (that's what he calls them). They lost to the Equally Stupid Steelers (I don't quite get the difference), but then the Oh No Don't Throw It to THAT Guy Bears forgot to field their A-Team and lost to the Pretty Prissy Patriots (next time, hopefully they'll put in Mr. T, Hannibal, and Murdock; I'm sure there's no job that they can't do). During the Bears game, I was talking for pretty much the entire second half. Mom and dad thought I was trying to give them a pep talk about their crappy teams, but what I was TRYING to tell them was that I had my own crappy team in my pants, and no one was listening to me (it was pretty gross, let me tell ya').



Anyway, this past month I had a great time at Mimi and Papi's brand spanking new house. I finally got to meet my Mom-o and Pop-o! They are mommy's mommy's mommy and daddy, so they are my Great Mimi and Great Papi, and they sure were great! Mom-o made sure that she got to hold me as much as possible, and she frequently played her "Great Grandma Trump Card" any time someone else tried to hold me.



So life is going great! I'm getting bigger and stronger, too. I haven't seen Mr. Doctor in a while, but daddy weighed himself and then weighed me to see that I was roughly 13 pounds. I don't like to lie on my stomach, but I am able to move my head back and forth and hold my head up high.



Looks like there are only 12 days until Christmas. I hope I'm going to get that new Cherry Red Corvette that I've always wanted! Dad says that I should ask for one and he'll keep it in really good condition until I can drive. I can't wait to see everyone at Christmas!

-WDJ

Will Jacob @ Two Months: Ecce, Puer!

Salvete, Populus Mundi!

Hi everyone! Daddy and mommy want me to be super-star student, so they've been teaching me some Latin. I just said, "Hello, People of the World!" and the title of the journal says, "Behold, the Boy!" Other than Latin, mommy and daddy are reading books to me everyday like "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish," "Goodnight, Moon," and "Infinite Jest" by David Foster Wallace (Dad thinks I will understand that book before he will).

I've been gaining weight this past month, and the doctor weighed me at 10 lbs. and 8 oz. just yesterday. I'm also exactly 24 inches long! My mommy, though, is a little depressed because I only need to grow 36 inches more to become taller than she (it's really 39.5 inches, but daddy says that's why he needs to teach me math). My cheeks are becoming fuller and my legs are getting stronger. I can stand up if mommy or daddy holds me. I'm also starting to smile a little bit more often. I think it's mostly from farting, but don't tell mater et pater (sorry, I mean, mommy and daddy). They can't wait until I start smiling when they tickle me or bounce me up and down.



I got to celebrate my first Halloween this year! Mommy and daddy went to a pumpkin-carving party and mommy did a great job carving a scary face (I wasn't scared of it), and daddy's job was to get the goopy stuff out of the middle. For actual Halloween, I dressed up as a pumpkin, and everyone said I was the most pulchritudinous puer that they've met! (which means that I'm a cute guy, of course)

This past week has been very interesting for me. Mommy and daddy celebrated their third anniversary on Wednesday, and I got to spend time with Grandma Nancy and Grandpa Mark. Mommy and daddy went out to eat at Bella Luna, which is Italian for "beautiful moon." Dad told me that it probably should be "luna bella," but I told dad that he's a dork. Dad got mom perfume, and mom got dad cologne. I guess they both smell like stercus (poopy).

On Friday, mommy got a call from the daycare center, and they said that I had a rash on my arms. Mom called the doctor and dad picked me up early from daycare to take me in. It wasn't a big deal at all. I just need to put some lotion on my skin because I've got really sensitive skin like mommy and daddy (Mommy said I have princess skin... Mom, I have to disagree. I've got M.C. Hammer-like skin: It's so cool, you can't touch it.).

Also on Friday, I got a surprise visit from Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Bob. Right now mommy and Grandma Kathy are taking me shopping (or, as dad calls it, unnecessary torture), and Grandpa Bob and daddy are watching football (man, I missed out).

Well, until next time, remember these words of wisdom: Faber est quisque fortunae suae:
Every man is architect of his own fortune.

Valete, omnes! Goodbye, everyone!

Will's Journal: I'm One Month Old!

Hey World!

Wow, I'm a whole month old now! Isn't that amazing? It feels like just yesterday when I poopied on the doctor. Now I just poopy on mommy. She's not too happy when I do that, but, you know what... I kind of like it! Sometimes I even give mom what she calls The Royal Treatment (TRT): When my diaper comes off, I just pee like like an-out-of-control fire hose, and once that's done... ahhh.... some nice diarrhea comes pouring out... It's like magma. It's "loads" of fun, if you know what I mean! I've been giving mommy TRT almost every other day. Dad got to experience TRT just once, and he nearly bailed on the family. He was half-way to Mexico when he realized that there's only other place in the world that smells worse than my diaper (dad says he's just joking, but sometimes I wonder about him... he's a little weird). In addition to giving mommy and daddy TRTs, I have a ton of other fun activities that I enjoy: Sleeping, Napping, Snoozing, Crying, Sounding Like a Smurf When I'm About to Cry, Swinging on my Swing, and Reading Books with Mommy and Daddy.

So anyway, I went to the doctor today and I now weigh 9.0 lbs and I'm 21.5 inches long! I'm pretty long and thin, just like my daddy. The doctor said that I may even be taller, but I don't like to stretch out all that much. He told me that I was in "excellent" condition. The only problems that I have is that I have a goopy eye and I have sensitive skin (just like mommy and daddy). But I am a pretty darn healthy baby! I've been getting much stronger now with my once-every-three-hours Protein Milk Shake. I'm totally doing Zero Carbs so that I can work on muscle definition and lose some fat. I'm trying to move my head a ton and I've been holding onto mommy and daddy's fingers. I'm also working on my kung-fu kicking, so that I can kick some major tail when I get older.



Also this past month, I got to meet a plethora of new family members a few weekends ago: Uncle Mike Jacob, Aunt Janet, Lauren, Mellisa, Bryan, Grandpa Bob, Grandma Kathy, Aunt Rebekah, Uncle Tophie, Special Friend Alyssa, Aunt Sary, Uncle Ben, my Awesome New Cousin Skylee, and my Furry Cousin Augie! They all visited me on back-to-back weekends. It was great! Poor Grandma Kathy couldn't stay too long because a Great Big Bad Sickness got her, but she's better now and I can't wait to see her again along with everyone else on Thanksgiving!



Well World, it's been nice catching up with you. I'll talk to you again soon!

WDJ

P.S. Here's a picture of me and mommy from today!

Will Jacob's Journal

Hello, my name is William David Jacob, but you can call me Will, and this is my journal. I was born on September 16, 2010 at 10:12 a.m. I weighed 8 lbs. and 2 oz. and I was 20.75 inches long. My mommy was originally scheduled to give birth to me today (9/21), but I just couldn’t wait any longer in the womb. I listened to my dad last Sunday watch the Bengals game against the Patriots, and it sounded like they needed help on defense, so I decided to come early to learn the game-plan for Sunday’s game against the Ravens. I was so excited for the game that I fell asleep. I don’t think mom and dad would’ve let me play anyway. That’s no fun.

Anyway, back to my birth, my mom had this thing called a C-section because I wanted to hit the ground running when I was born. Plus, I was a little big (85^th percentile in weight!), and mom didn’t want to deal with that. I wasn’t out of the womb for more than two seconds before I pooped on the doctor, and then when the nurse took me to clean me off, I peed all over her. Dad found out later that they were Steelers fans, and he was very proud of me in my efforts. He told me that he’s going to take me to all of his tailgate parties before football games so that we can find all the Steelers fans out there so I can poop and pee on them.

My mom and dad spent the next three days at Christ Hospital in Cincinnati. We had a very nice room with a spectacularific view of Cincinnati. We were nine floors up and we could see for many miles. Mom and dad liked to watch the sunset while rocking me to sleep. Dad liked the room a lot, but the TV was very small and it didn’t have Comedy Central, but it did have ESPN and FoxSports Ohio so we could watch some sports. My dad was a little bummed out that the Reds lost the day that I was born, but he said that’s okay because I was born into a world where the Reds have always been in first place. The Reds “magic number” for the playoffs is six. Whatever that means, dad. He’s a little weird about that stuff. He tells me that one day I’ll understand.

We had many nice people visit us during our stay in the hospital. Grandma Nancy and Aunt Jo saw me on Thursday, and then they came back to see me again with Aunt Katie, Uncle Sean, my cousin Ron, and Uncle Mike! It was great to see my new family! Grandma Kathy and Grandpa Bob will see me soon, but they did get to hear me and my “Voicing My Discomfort with This Weird, New World” on the first day. I can’t wait to meet them and all of my new family members, including Mom-o, Pop-o, Aunt Beka, Uncle Wes, Aunt Sara, Uncle Ben, my cousin Skylee, Uncle Toph, his friend Alyssa, Uncle Ryan, and his friend Brandie. I have a great, huge family!

My mom says that I’m a very good eater, and I also sleep very well. And the only time that I’m “Voicing My Discomfort with Something,” it’s for obvious reasons (poopy diaper, I’m not swaddled, I’m hungry, or the Bengals/Reds are losing… wait, that’s just dad… he “voices his discomfort” a lot). When mom or dad swaddle me, they like to call me "Burrito Will." I think they go to Chipotle too often.

I came home on Sunday, September 20 and I met my two awesome, furry sisters, Bella and Lola! They have been very excited to see me, and I am a part of their pack now. They like to sniff me and they try to lick my hands and feet, but mom and dad won’t let them. On the first night at the house, Bella and Lola did not want to go to bed by themselves. They barked and whined because they wanted to make sure that I was okay. Luckily they realize now that mom and dad are taking great care of me so they don’t need to check up on me when they are in bed. Whenever I cry, though, they quickly run into the room to make sure I’m okay. If I’m in the crib, they try to look inside by standing on their hind legs, but they’re too short. I can’t wait until I get older so I can run around and play with them!

Well, I’m pretty tired right now. All this typing is wearing me out. And since I sleep about 20 hours a day, I think I need another nap. Well, world, it’s nice to have met you! So far life has been great and I have two wonderful parents!

- WDJ

Baby J at 36wks

Here he is -- little stinker has turned himself breach. I only got one photo, but it is 4-D. You can see part of his face (closed eye, ear, and nose). He has his right arm over his forehead and face. His hand is by his nose. Sorry the picture and the scanning isn't better quality.

It's a boy!

We had our 20 week sonogram today and guess what - it's a healthy baby boy! Everything looked normal. Dave is already planning for the NFL draft 2032.....

"Growing like a weed!"

Well we had ultrasound #2 today, and Dave was able to attend. This was our last appointment with Dr. Thomas and now we can switch to a regular OBGYN. He said everything looks great and the little "Peep" is now 2.49cm in length (about the size of a grape). and I'm measuring at 9 weeks 1 day. He said the ultrasound shows a little farther than I really am -- baby is "growing like a weed!"

The heart beat was strong again and we could see the baby moving, though I can't feel it yet.

Here is a picture with notes!

Our Baby

Hello everyone,





Yes it's been ages since I posted on here. It's kind of embarassing. But maybe it's a good embarassing that I have had no more encounters with Bambi. Sure there has been noteworthy stuff, but I got busy.





Anyway, with the good news that Dave and I now have to share, I thought I would take advantage of the blog more often.





Today I had my first pregnancy ultrasound with the endocrinologist today and he confirmed that the baby is right on track and I got to hear its heartbeat today. Unfortunately Dave couldn't go!








I realize it looks like I have a peep inside of me, but the doctor assures me that this is a baby. :)

Next appt will be 2/22 and it's in the afternoon so Dave can go. As long as everything checks out fine at that appt. I can stop seeing the endocrinologist and go to a regular doctor.

xoxo Kate